Honoring an Extraordinary Life: A Tribute to My Beloved Father-in-Law’s Enduring Legacy

This is, without a doubt, the most profoundly difficult post I have ever had to compose. Just a little over four months ago, I shared the devastating news of my sweet father-in-law’s glioblastoma brain tumor diagnosis. Even then, I could never have imagined that come June, I would be penning the somber words announcing his passing. While our family was acutely aware of the grim statistics associated with this aggressive form of cancer, especially when combined with his age of 76, we clung fiercely to the hope of more time – more laughter, more memories, more shared moments. Consequently, we are now navigating a period of intense grief and disorientation, as anyone would expect when facing such a profound loss. The suddenness, despite the diagnosis, leaves us reeling, trying to process a world irrevocably changed by his absence.

I understand that the usual scope of this blog typically revolves around different subjects, but I sincerely hope you will extend your patience and understanding as I take a moment to reflect on an exemplary life, truly well-lived. It feels vital to share the remarkable journey of a man who touched so many lives, and whose legacy will continue to resonate deeply within our family and beyond.

I distinctly remember the very first time I had the pleasure of meeting my future father-in-law. It was a lively atmosphere, at an Oregon Duck football game, no less! In those initial moments, it became immediately clear where my husband, Brian, inherited his incredible sense of humor and his boundless love for life. His quick wit, his infectious laugh, and the twinkle in his eye were instantly disarming and welcoming. I also quickly learned that bringing chocolate chip cookies was always a good idea, a simple gesture that brought him genuine delight. Beyond his joyful demeanor, he was a man of impressive intellect and dedication. A true scholar, he was a proud recipient of a prestigious Fulbright Scholarship, an honor that took him on an enriching journey to Turkey. Following this international experience, he dedicated over 30 years of his life to a career teaching high school mathematics, molding young minds and instilling in them a love for learning and problem-solving. His passion for education was evident in every interaction, a foundational pillar of his character.

Yet, his commitment to teaching and his desire to serve extended far beyond his initial retirement. When he and my mother-in-law concluded their teaching careers here, they embarked on an extraordinary new chapter, moving first to Kuwait and then to Bahrain to continue their calling in education. This decision was a powerful testament to the guiding principles of their lives: that God and people were the two most important things. They embodied this philosophy daily, serving communities abroad through their teaching and their unwavering faith. Upon their return, their passion for missions remained undimmed. They tirelessly continued to support and encourage others to consider missionary work, understanding its transformative power and its capacity to connect people across cultures and continents.

The blessings we received from his attentive and profoundly caring ways with our children are immeasurable. He wasn’t merely a fun grandpa, though he excelled at that too, creating countless joyful memories. He also took immense pleasure in teaching them timeless truths from the Bible, nurturing their spiritual growth with patience and wisdom. More importantly, he didn’t just teach these truths; he vibrantly lived them out every single day, serving as an inspirational example for them to witness firsthand. His actions consistently mirrored his words, leaving an indelible mark on their hearts and minds.

Perhaps I haven’t fully conveyed the extraordinary lengths to which both my in-laws went for their grandchildren. For over a decade, they meticulously planned and prepared a week-long summer camp, a cherished tradition known as “Camp Mil-Mar.” This annual gathering took place at the picturesque Oregon Coast, usually at a beloved house originally built by Brian’s grandparents, Millet and Marion, from whom the camp derived its name. Each summer, the children would immerse themselves in a rich tapestry of activities: engaging crafts that sparked creativity, inspiring lessons about famous Christians such as the heroic Jim Elliot and the remarkable Eric Liddell, daily memorization of Bible verses, and the thrilling experience of learning to waterski on the tranquil lake adjacent to the house. Imagine the dedication, the foresight, and the sheer amount of love that went into sustaining such an incredible tradition for more than ten consecutive years. It was a monumental undertaking, driven purely by their desire to enrich the lives of their grandchildren, to impart invaluable life lessons, and to forge unforgettable memories. To say we were blessed by this unique expression of their love would truly be an understatement; it was a profound gift that shaped a generation.

His generous spirit was a constant, tangible force throughout the years, touching our lives in countless ways. Whether it was the thoughtful gesture of gifting us a reliable used car when we desperately needed one, physically joining us to dig a new trench for a waterline, or graciously covering the expenses for our cherished summer family get-togethers, he consistently did everything in his power to support us. His love wasn’t just expressed through words; it was demonstrated through his tireless efforts, his invaluable time, and whatever resources he could afford to share. He understood that true generosity extended beyond monetary value, encompassing acts of service and shared experiences that built lasting bonds.

Having worked his entire life as a dedicated teacher, and always being prudent and careful with his money, we never took any of his contributions lightly. Every act of generosity was deeply appreciated and understood within the context of his disciplined and principled life. He taught us, through his actions, that a truly generous spirit transcends financial means. We knew that even if he had nothing material to give, he would have gladly offered his most precious commodity – his time – to anyone who needed it. This profound willingness to help, to serve, and to give of himself defined much of his character and left an enduring impression on all who knew him. His legacy is not just one of gifts, but of a selfless spirit that prioritized the needs and well-being of others.

My daughter and I recently had a poignant conversation about how Grandpa lived his life – truly for God and to the absolute fullest. We came to a powerful realization: if he had known last June that he only had a year left to live, he almost certainly would not have lived it any differently. This speaks volumes about the depth and integrity of his character. He harbored no regrets, no unfulfilled desires that required a sudden scramble to check off a “bucket list.” His entire existence was a testament to living intentionally and faithfully every single day. He profoundly loved God and people, investing tirelessly in relationships, nurturing connections, and openly sharing his beliefs with kindness and conviction. He continued this steadfast devotion right up to the moment that a splitting headache abruptly changed his world, and ours. His life was a beautiful, continuous journey of pursuing what he felt God called him to do, traveling and experiencing life without waiting for a “perfect” time or a future opportunity that might never arrive. He lived in the present, making the most of every day with purpose and joy.

That, my friends, is an example truly worth following – a blueprint for a life rich in meaning, faith, and impact.

To my sweet friends, I extend my deepest gratitude for your incredibly uplifting words, your amazing kindness, and the unwavering support you’ve shown our family over these past difficult months. And especially on Facebook – wow, the outpouring of love there was truly overwhelming. From the very depths of my heart, I felt a profound virtual hug from each of you, and it genuinely provided comfort and strength during our darkest hours. Your collective empathy has been a beacon in this storm of grief. As we navigate the complex landscape of loss, let this serve as a heartfelt reminder to hold your loved ones closer than ever before. Cherish every moment, invest in every conversation, and spend as much time with them as you possibly can. Life is precious and fleeting, and the love we share is its most enduring legacy. Thank you for walking this path with us.